It has come to our attention, through the most curious tidings provided by the chronicles of StarHit, that Mr. Prokhor Shalyapin, a gentleman of the musical arts and a showman of no small ambition, has expressed a desire for progeny—provided, of course, that said progeny do not actually reside beneath his own roof.

One cannot help but admire the exquisite logic of the man. Mr. Shalyapin declares a longing to be the father of two, perhaps three children. He speaks with great solemnity of his desire to ensure the infants are 'fully loved' and promises to provide for the family with a generosity that would make a banker blush. Yet, here is where the plot thickens: the gentleman intends to maintain a separate residence, far removed from the joyful chaos of the nursery.

'A child,' he asserts with the confidence of a philosopher, 'cares little whether the parents share a single bed or a single dwelling. What matters is that the babe be loved, walked, and showered with trinkets.'

Truly, a marvel of modern sensibility! The arrangement, as envisioned by the singer, is as follows: he shall visit his offspring, offer his affections for a brief interval, and then vanish. The poor mother shall inform the children that 'Father is diligently working,' while, in reality, the gentleman shall be reclining in his own separate quarters, recovering from the fatigue of his theatrical triumphs in peace and solitude.

It is worth noting, dear readers, that Mr. Shalyapin had previously voiced a most steadfast reluctance to enter into the holy bond of matrimony. His reasoning was of a most material nature: he possesses far too many properties to risk the complications of a marriage settlement. He maintains that the only circumstance which might tempt him to the altar would be the birth of children—though, as we have seen, he intends to be a father who provides the silver spoon but avoids the midnight crying of the babe.